Starcrossed: A non-racers perspective
I am not a racer. I am a half-hearted spectator at best, and I ride my bicycle here and there, but without anything qualifying as dedication. It would be an over-statement to say I was dragged to Starcrossed on Saturday; I went willingly, and was even able to muster some enthusiasm, if only because my fashionable flannel was now both appropriate and necessary. The following is my layman’s account of Saturday’s event.
Arrive 2:30 P.M. Marymoor park seems like a great spot for a race, lots of room, lots of parking, and ample port-a-potties. Am kicking self for not bringing dog. Off leash dog park is just steps away, and I know my naughty pet would love to run through the mud. Other attendees seem to have taken advantage of the location, and I spend the first half-hour or so posted up on a picnic table at the uBRDO tent watching all sorts of dogs in ALL SORTS OF SWEATERS parade past me. Heaven. A giant, hairy malamute howls a greeting to her approaching owner. Some sort of long, low, Labrador-Basset hound hybrid makes it’s duck-footed way through the crowd. A strange little spotted puggish-yorkie thingy keeps popping up, and I can’t tell if there are five enthusiastic chocolate labs, or just one who gets around.
Chat 3:00 P.M. Meet up with our friend Andrew who is racing, and am commissioned to take video of the race using his sweet little video device. This thing is great! It is super simple, pretty much just on/off. Wow, now I have a task. Important. Don’t fuck this one up, Jen.
3:30 P.M. Do some stuff. Geoff goes to the car to get the race Whip to display in a stand (hey why not?) and hands me his gigantic camera to hold. Oooh nice. I snap a few photos of the car (exciting!), and they look like garbage so I ask Geoff for a couple pointers.
ME: Hey, um, how do you do that thing to make it like, darker? Like make it slower or the aperture or whatever so it looks cool?
GEOFF: (walking around the car undoing latches, rummaging, lifting bikes, etc.) What? What are you asking me?
ME: DEPTH OF FIELD. I want LESS of it. How?
GEOFF: Are you asking me to tell you how to take photos right now? (still rummaging) You realize that that’s like asking someone how to paint a picture?
ME: Wull…yeah I guess so.
GEOFF: (takes camera and starts showing me dials and screens) Ok, this (turns a black dial) is aperture and this (turns another black dial) is shutter speed. Ok?
ME: Ok.
GEOFF: …and so the amount of light….blah blah blah…and the shutter speed…depth of blah blah…got it?
ME: Yeah. Thanks!
But I totally don’t got it, so I mess around a little more, figure out how to not be able to focus it, and wander back to the uBRDO tent where I accidentally take a good picture of Scotty. Then I give the camera back to Geoff and whip out the easy little video device. A yellow lab is snuffling around under a nearby table and I take a few seconds of video…I bet Andrew will really like this!
4:00 Race! Geoff and I go to watch Andrew race. It’s always more fun to watch when you have someone to cheer on, and it’s easy to spot Andrew in his leaf green Bike Hugger kit. We run into Geoff’s Wines teammate, Harry Pepe who has also come to the beer garden and as it’s located in the center of the velodrome, it’s a great vantage point. We can see the racers as they descend into the velodrome, then loop around some hairpin turns (a few go down, but nothing too dramatic) on one end of the oval-shaped beer garden, then move to one side to watch the jumping of the barriers (always exciting) and then move to the other side for the finish line. I do my best to get some video of Andrew, and Harry tells us that the guy with the stuffed shirt and the crazy wig/helmet thing is another Wines guy, EJ. I include him in my cinematographic efforts, and we all wonder how he can stand doing this race with that costume on. Geoff and Harry sip on some kind of microbrews and I am envious, as I am on a month long cleanse which doesn’t include beer. Or the crepes I can smell from the nearby food tent. Or cigarettes, (although no one here seems to be smoking so that’s not much of a temptation). Or whiskey. Lame.
5:00 BORED!
5:15 Met up. Our friends James (who works at uBRDO) and Nick show up for their race. James is riding the Baron F. Nightingale which is outfitted with extra-snazzy dura-ace wheels. It looks pretty slick, and I am excited to see it in the race. I have surrendered Andrew’s video-taker to him, and find myself without a job. But I am hungry.
5:50 Whole foods. Andrew needs to go to the nearby Whole Foods to retrieve his son’s lost turquoise Croc that he apparently kicked off in the parking lot at a previous visit. I tag along so I can get some cleanse-worthy food, and while he looks under parked cars I make my way into the massive Eastside outpost of the health food retailer.
6:15 Chalet Mart. Or somesuch odd mini-mart name. We stop to buy some Rainier for the uBRDO guys. Chalet Mart’s shelves are inexplicably half-empty; either it’s just begun or it’s coming to a close. Friendly, chubby clerk with lots of gravy stains on his t shirt, but jokes around with us. I look for a magazine, but all they have are Powerboater, Monster Trucks, Off Road Monthly, Hustler (which is probably not allowed on my cleanse), and a few old Thrifty Nickels. Damn.
6:30 Back to the race. I decide to take a break and warm up in the car while I eat my not-delicious dinner. I am well-bundled, but have been freezing cold all day, though plenty of people (Scotty, Christine Chang) are in their shirtsleeves. Odd. Maybe the beer is having an insulating effect. Wouldn’t know about that, would I?
7:00 Done with crappy dinner. Exit car, stop to pet strange, teensy tiny little yorkie whose tongue hangs out the side of his mouth even when it’s closed. He seems to be trying to get away from his person. Heh. I go back to the uBRDO tent, am told by Geoff that Sam from HB dressed up in a really cool robot suit for the last race, but because it didn’t have sleeves they disqualified him after a couple laps. Bummer. Geoff got some good pictures of it though. Sam later changed into a pirate costume (or maybe that’s how he always dresses), which I think is all you can do when you you’ve already been a robot right?
7:30 Weather. Meet up with Trisha, Jamie, Dave and his wife Kim, who is usually my fellow bike-wife. Kim and I post up on some grass to chat while the enthusiasts watch the women’s race. It begins to rain, a little at first and then it gets serious. I have a hat on, but Kim is getting soaked until Trisha brings us an umbrella. Nice! We decide to move to the beer garden. It is pretty crowded, we catch the end of the women’s race, and try to get a good vantage point for the pro 1/2 race. It is positively pouring at this point, Kim is wearing flip flops. She said last time she wore her rubber boots, but felt silly because she didn’t need them at all. Ha ha. The pro 1/2 starts, and it is actually pretty amazing. We are standing back from the railing so we can stay dry under the tent, and we see the helmets of the riders approaching the barriers speed up, dismount, jump over the barriers, and remount without missing a beat. From where we are standing, it looks like there aren’t even any barriers, they are that fast, and that smooth. The caliber of racing is pretty astonishing, actually. The riders are covered with mud from head to toe, it looks like it should be some sort of dramatic Gatorade commercial or something!
